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Umpty F*cking Squat is the culmination of Bobby Grace's Cayo series - as far as he's concerned anyway. "F*ck this story telling shit," he was overheard saying at the vecinos' table one night at Texas Mike's after several rounds of tequila. "I'd rather be giving enemas to wild honey badgers!" Having said it in English it is unlikely the Q'eqchi' he was drinking with understood what he said but all seemed to agree that giving enemas to wild honey badgers - or 'dando enemas a los tejones de miel salvajes' as folks would say in the Cayo - could possibly turn out better for Bobby than pursuing a writing career.
== Critical Acclaim for Umpty F*cking Squat ==
"Absorbant. Great for drips and spills...."
"Definitely a bridge farther than Operation Market Garden...."
"Punctuation at the end of nearly every sentence...."
"I can say without contradiction Umpty F*cking Squat places Bobby Grace first among his peers in literature that's been written in English on a boat in a Q'eqchi' jungle aldea by a retired American guitar player...."
"A dandelion in the literary flower garden...."