Trophy Mom

With sharp wit and a self-deprecating sense of humor, Charlotte Observer humor columnist Tracy Curtis shares a collection of stories about motherhood and the mother of all seasons, spring. Trophy Mom compiles the failure and the funny in trying to be the perfect mom during a season of mayhem.

The kids won't spring ahead an hour, so they drag an hour behind. Spring break is still yelling at the kids, just with an ocean view. And why is a "perfect game" in baseball a game when nothing happens? Scheduling a girls' lunch is like coordinating the G8 summit. Recipe prep times are off by about ninety minutes. It's impossible to decide between bangs and Botox. "Skinny" jeans have been whittled down to "toothpick" -- and everybody's running around in yoga pants, which aren't even pants And what's with fourth grade math? It doesn't even have numbers in it

Trophy Mom reminds us that if you're waiting for life to be perfect... you're going to be waiting a while